Why did we do that? Why do we do what we do? Strategies and Techniques to Guide Our Lives by Michael Crow, Crow International Human beings are all uniquely different. We see things differently; we interpret things in our own, individual way; and we all go about doing things in a hundred different ways. As the French say, ìViva la Difference!î ñ because if we all agreed on everything, the world would certainly be dull. What is fascinating is how we arrive at such different conclusions given the same data. For example: You can't help overhearing the telephone conversation of a co-worker at the next desk. ìHave you seen her lately? She's enormous! She never stops eating. She just seems to lie around all day and never gets any exercise. He doesn't take any notice of her at all anymore. It's such a shame!î How cruel you think. Why is it other people judge overweight people so harshly and discriminate against them? Then you hear, "That's right. You have to walk large dogs like that every day." Ouch! You had leapt to an inaccurate conclusion before all the information was available - and completely misread the interaction. It happens to us all. We get busy, we forget to ask, we don't listen well, or we misinterpret information. In the example above, the strategy was ineffective and inappropriate for the situation. It led to an incorrect conclusion and you almost made a complete fool of yourself! What out-of-date or ineffective strategies are you using in your life? What methods no longer work for you or the people around you? In my book, Intentional Identity, How to Have Everything You Want in Two Days or Less, I explain that strategies are really just familiar road maps we use to guide us toward our objectives. A strategy is similar to a game plan we refer back to ñ again and again. Often our strategies were formed early by information we received as children. They were based upon: Fear of punishment, embarrassment and the unknown, curiosity, wonder, and a desire to be acknowledged. Intellectually, as we reach adulthood we understand that the reasoning formed by this dependent thinking, no longer applies. However, unless we understand and accept responsibility as independent and interdependent ìgrown-upsî, we will continue to use these strategies ñ even though they no longer apply. For instance, we have the power to choose our careers and our partners, but how often do we continue to maintain the status-quo, because of fear and embarrassment? Once we accept and take control of our lives, we once again discover the freedom and joy of curiosity. We are able to develop creative solutions and strategies to lead us successfully toward our desired objectives and outcomes. The most effective and reliable strategies are those based on a foundation of our personal value system ñ who we are and what we stand for. Once you have identified and prioritized your values, your subconscious will create an image of your desired outcome. The subsequent actions taken, are then guided by the STRATEGIES you implement, to arrive at the desired OUTCOME. If your objective is value centered, you will feel inspired and committed. When you are comfortable that what drives you is congruent with who you are, you'll discover that your motivation and productivity increases, and you'll enjoy tremendous personal satisfaction. A truly effective and productive strategy is based on values, combined with experience, strength, passion and a positive attitude. The result is almost always a successful outcome. What is your desired outcome? What successful strategies can you implement in your life to guide you toward getting things done and accomplishing your goals? Without taking time to ask yourself some important questions, you may be using the wrong strategy - for yourself or the situation. The first step to achieving strategic alignment in your life is to clarify: 1. What do you want? 2. How do you want it? 3. How you will know when you've got it? 4. What will happen if you don't get it? The key here is to weigh the first three questions against the fourth. Questions 1 ñ 3 are designed to focus your energy on moving toward your desired outcomes with a positive influence. Question 4 moves you away from your objective. However, understanding the consequences of this question, allows you to plan a practical ìfail safeî strategy. Once you have the answer to question four let it go, and don't dwell on it. Focusing on positive strategies (gain versus loss) and keeping your attitude upbeat, keeps your eye on the prize. Over the years our desires, drive and definition of success constantly change, and we need to continually check our ìmapî of strategies to make sure we are still on track. (Instead of racing round the world sightseeing, you decide to explore closer to home. Instead of that bright red sports car, you decide on a comfortable BMW sedan.) The ìmapî or strategy may occasionally need reexamining, but the winning formula never varies: VALUES + STRATEGY + PASSION + ATTITUDE = SUCCESS In this world of "coulda, woulda, shouldas" we occasionally loose sight of the fact that in a free society, we all have the freedom to choose. If we choose to take control of our lives and take responsibility for our actions, we empower ourselves to accomplishing almost anything we want in life. By choosing our attitude and selecting the right strategy for us in each situation, we choose successful outcomes. We always have a choice. What will you choose? ©2000 Michael Crow, Crow International, San Diego, CA. All Rights Reserved. Michael Crow delivers professional speaking, training, and consulting programs on individual and organizational effectiveness. Michael is the author of the book "Intentional Identity: How to have everything you want in two days...or less! " Michael's core solutions, Change, Influence, and Communications will help your team create effective strategies for maintaining common ground. To obtain the book or schedule Michael Crow to speak at your organization, call 800-488- 4473, or go to www.keynotespeaker.com, e-mail: spkrcrow@keynotespeaker.com