© Copyright 2004                               Why Financial Seminars are terrible and what to do about it! Part Four The Values Controversy by Michael Lovas, , C. Ht. NOTE: This article is taken from Michael's workshop "Psychological Persuasion for Financial Seminars." Scenario #1. Picture yourself talking face-to-face with an audience member or a prospect. You sing the praises of your products, services and philosophy, but her wandering eyes tell you that she's lost interest. What do you do? Scenario #2. Picture yourself talking with someone about estate protection or insurance. You make your case and the person says, "I know I need it, but I still don't want it." What went wrong? What do you do? Scenario #3. Picture yourself continuing to talk with the person in #2. You get animated and say, "Here's why this protection is importantÖ." What did you do wrong? If you can't answer those questions, you're probably breaking rapport with your audience and many of the people who walk into your office. In other words, you're chasing money away from you. As simple as those scenarios are, they paint a picture of what most advisors experience - bumping into a brick wall and not knowing what went wrong. Actually there is only one flaw in all those scenarios - the advisor based his presentation on his own sense of what's important. He gambled and lost; he guessed and failed. That caused him to lose some credibility. Then, he didn't know what to do to gain it back. He failed to discover the actual values of his audience members before launching into his presentation. Not good. The element we're looking at here is called "Criteria." Those are your prospect's most important values. For simplicity, let's just call them "Values" with a capital "V." They are vital to you - if you want to help the prospect accomplish at least three tactical goals: 1) Wants. They are instrumental in turning a need into a want. 2) Relevance. They are your link to relevance - without them, your presentation is probably irrelevant. 3) Motivation. They create a motivating link between you and the prospect. In other words, when you can learn your prospect's actual Values, you will be directly connected to the exact things that motivate that person. That means your information will be more relevant and your presentation will be based on deep-seated wants - rather than on mere needs or even product features. Now, you've taken step one - you know that you need to discover a person's Values. Next, you need to avoid the three biggest dangers of focusing on Values. Major Danger 1. Trust - or Not. Here's the situation - we're in a face-to-face conversation following your seminar. You ask me to name my Values. If I don't already trust you, I'd rather host a Taliban fundraiser than tell you my Values! In other words, if you don't already have highly honed skills at "reading" people and using what you learn to build rapport and develop trust, you're not apt to learn my honest Values. So, the dangers are: 1) you risk losing all hope of gaining my trust. And, 2) you risk looking like a charlatan and self-serving manipulator. The cure? Simply learn better skills for "reading" people; then, use your observations to build rapport and develop trust. Major Danger 2. The "real life" value of Values. In our industry, the standard communication tactic is a direct, frontal assault from the first-person-singular perspective. In other words, if you want to know my Values, you'd just ask: "Er, Mike, what are your values?" Not a good idea. As a Clinical Hypnotherapist, I learn people's Values all the time. But I know better than to ask them directly. It would be a futile exercise. This is so important, I can't stress it enough: your prospects and audience members do not know what their actual Values are. Do not ask them to name values! Quick Psych Lesson: The direct approach bumps directly into the other person's conscious mind. The conscious mind fulfills some important functions, but cataloging Values is not one of them. To understand the conscious mind, picture a battle-hardened Marine sergeant standing guard over your mind. He is an ever-vigilant skeptic who scrutinizes every thought applying for access and rejects most of them. Your conscious mind mainly dismisses or diminishes everything coming in, but ultimately operates at a surface level. So, when you ask me, "Er, Mike, what are your values?" my conscious mind (the Sarg) can't access the important ones. And, when I answer directly, you get misleading or inaccurate answers. You get a list of values that I'd like to have, or ones that I want you to think I have. If not the direct approach, then what? In my therapy practice (otherwise called the "improving your life from the inside-out," I learn a client's Values from a simple process of: 1) building honest rapport, 2) asking contextually appropriate questions and 3) listening very carefully to the answers. This is the process you should be using if you want to learn someone's actual Values. Major Danger 3. Installing. Installing is the most common error committed by people trying to understand someone else's Values. Therapists consider installing as a form of manipulation. But, advisors are taught how to do it all the time. It sounds like this: "Mike, what's important about money to you?" Why is that a Major Danger? Because most people don't value money. They value what money represents to their subconscious mind. If you and I carry on a long conversation and I open up to you, mentioning often that Donald Trump and I have one thing in common - we both love money, then, you'd be able to ask me that question. But, if you start the conversation by mentioning "money," then, you're installing a Value-related context. I will probably answer it and give you the best answers I can come up with. But, they won't do much good, because all the answers are based on something that is probably not one of my Values. In fact, the research shows that most people don't consider money as one of their top values. Here's an analogy. You ask, "Mike, what's important about worms to you?" I answer, "OK, well, they're good for my lawn. And, they help people fish more successfully. And, they eliminate heavy metals from the dirt. And, boys like to scare girls with them. So, I guess they're really pretty important." That may all be true, but they still don't have a place in my Values. Rules about Values: You can't suggest Values to me. Even if I agree, the responses I give are contaminated. Values have to come from me. I have to tell you what my values are, without knowing that I did it. You have to build rapport and trust before you start probing for my values. You can assume my values by knowing enough psychology to recognize my personality type. But, you'd have to verify before using them. When you learn someone's personality type before your presentation starts, you can "guess" his values, and you can then build rapport very quickly. When you know the values of your audience members, you can make your presentation relevant. When you build rapport before your presentation starts, and make your presentation relevant, you will set more appointments. Is this harder than you thought? Probably. Is it impossible. No. What's the difference between this approach and the direct approach? The direct approach will give you a smokescreen. This approach will tell you what I value most. How can you use my Values? You can use them to show me how your solutions are relevant to my life. You can use them to give me a picture of how you can improve my situation. You can use them to turn my needs into things that I actually want. More often than not, that's what will trigger me to consider making a purchase decision or scheduling an appointment. Claim your prize right now. If you read my column, you know that I always give a prize to people who read the entire article. This month, you can trust me to do the same thing. Just call me at 214.366.0919; tell me you read Part 4 - the whole thing - and I'll give you a 50% discount off my new workbook, "How to Distinguish Yourself in a Crowded Market." How good are you? And, if better is possible, is "good enough" acceptable to you? If not, what will you do right now to get better? Recommended Resources: Psychological Persuasion Workshop, Michael Lovas Face Values, Michael Lovas & Pamela Holloway Coaching from an NLP Master and Language & Behavior expert Michael Lovas is the creator of "Credibility-focused Psychological Marketing and Selling." As a Clinical Hypnotherapist and Master Practitioner of Neuro-linguistic Programming (NLP), Michael teaches advisors the psychological secrets necessary to improve seminars and face-to-face presentations. Michael is the author of two books on using psychology to improve business: Beyond Wave Marketing (the bible of psychological marketing) and the new book/disk set Face Values (the bible of "reading" people without their knowing it). A former comic, Michael also delivers many very entertaining seminars and keynote presentations in the US and Canada. Michael Lovas 10718 Morning Glory Dr. Dallas, TX 75229 michael@aboutpeople.com www.credibilitymarketing.com (214) 366-0919